I don't like yours and you don't like mine (and the fire inside)

I've been thinking about disappearing .   Just vanishing without a word, without a trace .

I mean, if one decides to disappear , it doesn't make sense to tell anyone because there are always people who would try to talk you out of it, or tell you they would miss you, or fill you with guilt, or persuade you to stay, or tell you that one can't really ever disappear .

I don't know, it's something I am pondering.....


I hate starting all my sentences with "I" but I think this blog is going to be full of "I" sentences, so you will just have to bear with me.

I've been thinking about the people I have blogged with in more than one place. Those of us who, like refugees, kept having to move because one site or another failed.  And I got to thinking about how I cannot stand most of the friends of my friends. (this doesn't apply to all of you though).  So then I got to wondering why certain people are friends with me, since I am so utterly different than the crowd they run with.

I left a certain site a couple of months back because. quite frankly, I didn't fit in with anyone there. And there were certain people there that I just could not stand.  Now I am seeing some of those people popping up over here..... bitches that I cannot stand. Some of my friends are quite fond of them , but I don't want anything to do with them. I don't want them coming near my page.  And I know that a couple of them have visited here.  So I have a dilemma which only I can solve.

Don't get me wrong. I never feel the need to tell anyone not to hang out with certain people. I can't stand anyone who tries to do that to me either. I don't like your friends, and you don't like mine and that is just how it is.    I just fade away, to get away from your friends who I cannot stand.

That is why I am thinking of disappearing .

Anyway, whatever I do, I do.   I do it to keep from having to stomach something distasteful . (to me)

That's the bright side of the internet.  You can just disappear, never to be seen again. With a click of the mouse...... POOF !

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I went to a Bob Seger concert a few years ago. My son bought tickets which is the only reason I went since I am basically a miser who doesn't like to spend money on frivolous things .  I waited throughout that whole concert to hear one song.  He walked off stage without singing it .......but luckily he came back  hahaha.  Why do they always do that ?  Here's the song and I couldn't find a good version on youtube except for the one which can be found at  40:45  on this playlist.  Heck this whole playlist is awesome.   But it was this one song........

                                                    "The Fire Inside"                                         

There's a hard moon risin' on the streets tonight
There's a reckless feeling in your heart as you head out tonight
Through the concrete canyons to the midtown light
Where the latest neon promises are burning bright

Past the open windows on the darker streets
Where unseen angry voices flash and children cry
Past the phony posers with their worn out lines
The tired new money dressed to the nines
The low life dealers with their bad designs
And the dilettantes with their open minds

You're out on the town, safe in the crowd
Ready to go for the ride
Searching the eyes, looking for clues
There's no way you can hide
The fire inside

Well you've been to the clubs and the discotheques
Where they deal one another from the bottom of a deck of promises
Where the cautious loners and emotional wrecks
Do an acting stretch as a way to hide the obvious
And the lights go down and they dance real close
And for one brief instant they pretend they're safe and warm

Then the beat gets louder and the mood is gone
The darkness scatters as the lights flash on
They hold one another just a little too long
And they move apart and then move on

On to the street, on to the next
Safe in the knowledge that they tried
Faking the smile, hiding the pain
Never satisfied
The fire inside
Fire inside

Now the hour is late and he thinks you're asleep
You listen to him dress and you listen to him leave
like you knew he would
You hear his car pull away in the street
Then you move to the door and you lock it when
he's gone for good

Then you walk to the window and stare at the moon
Riding high and lonesome through a starlit sky
And it comes to you how it all slips away
Youth and beauty are gone one day
No matter what you dream or feel or say
It ends in dust and disarray

Like wind on the plains, sand through the glass
Waves rolling in with the tide
Dreams die hard and we watch them erode
But we cannot be denied
The fire inside